Have you finally orgasmed yet?
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
