You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm passing your future prison.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
