It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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