Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
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