I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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