i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm like a savant for remembering names I learned while I was drunk. Seriously, I'm three for three. I'm on a roll.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
I need water and some morals
Randomize
