2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
My breasts were aching with rage.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
And then there was cum in my hair and he was making beans.
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