Sry I called you an 8
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
We were all in the pool and he showed up with a pitcher of margarita. Everyone swam over to him. He poured it directly into our mouths like we were a Sea World act.
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Randomize