Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I don't care. I'm going to fuck John's friend and it's all your fault.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
