Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
Randomize
