Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
even my farts smell like vagina
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
I CLEANED MY BATHROOM FOR YOU!! betrayal
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
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