Pappa wants mamma naked
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Someone came in the potted fern
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
