Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
Printing the vagina inspector badge was money well spent.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Randomize