its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
