Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
