Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
