His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Randomize
