but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
Randomize