You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
No, I'm not okay. Girls are wearing BUMPITS here.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
