My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
Your scrotum should have touched every square inch of that place by now. Start with the water fountain.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I dont think a "sorry ive slept with most of your teammates" text will do much
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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