I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Well I mean he still had sex with me after I told him that I play fetch with the kids I take care of, so I'm not really looking too far ahead with him...
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize