It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
