I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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