STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
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