so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Randomize