why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
Also you know what's irritating? When the guy you're sleeping with refuses to like any of your Instagram posts
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize