508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize