stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
My roommate just threatened to kill me with my own pan. Can I ever get away from the crazies?!
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
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