He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
