why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I think a kid would responsible me up
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Randomize
