Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Randomize
