I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
i just woke up reverse cowgirl on my couch. fully clothed. my laptop is on the floor sideways. blasting gay porn and lady gaga. pizza crust everywhere. goodmorning.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
