Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
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