just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
9 of the 12 girls i had sex with in college are on facebook
it was an ugly road back then. i'm sure time hasn't been friendly.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Jesus just hopped over the fence with a rack of coors. How's your Halloween?
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
Randomize
