theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
