GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
You tried feeding my python vodka through a funnel. Fuck off.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I just want to make out with him forever
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize