so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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