you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
So neither of us had a dollar bill and we couldnt find a straw so we spent all nite doing coke through penne pasta
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize