Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
