Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
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