He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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