I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
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