the new term for farting is butt boxing.
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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