There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
There's always time for handjobs
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Randomize
