Grow some girl-balls and come out already
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
I hate the hobo that sits outside our building
Joe or Chris?
do i even wanna kno y u kno their names?
well i came home drunk one night and Chris offered me a beer as i was coming in, it was kinda weird but i wasn't goin to deny a free beer. you're proolly talkin about Joe though, he's the one with the fucked up eye.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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