But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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