Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
its liver damage thursday
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
