READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
lesson learned: don't narrate out loud about how a girl is giving you head while she's doing it
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
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