Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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