Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
